"What are these purple things?"
 

On the second day of the opening weekend for Shanghaied I had an appointment in town that I couldn't miss & asked Zack to do the morning milking.  I got home in just enough time to turn around and leave again, but with Zack, I always need more than "just enough time".  So we were running a little late and I was concerned about making it to the theater on time.

On the way Zack was looking at himself in the mirror and our conversation went like this:
 

"Mom - what are these purple things?"

"Where?"

"Right here" (pointing at his chin)

(Since I'm driving I look quickly at his chin)

"Oh, that's just make up from last night we didn't clean off very well"

(Then I realize that I had washed his makeup off myself and he'd taken a shower before we left.)

"Let me see that again... Honey, that looks like a bruise!  Is that a bruise?"

"No" (covering up his chin)

"Zack, did you get hurt today?" (Thinking about the ways that could happen)

"No"

"Honey, it's OK.  If you got hurt I want you to tell me, OK?"

"OK..." (He goes deep in thought)  "OK... I'll tell you..." (Deeper in thought)

(I think "Uh-oh... here it comes...)

Long pause...

"OK... If I tell you the truth now, you wont get mad, right?"

"No, Sweetheart, if you tell me the truth now I won't get mad" (that's our rule)

Really long pause... followed by an increasingly stressed look on his face... then he blurted out:

"I'M SORRY I WAS PLAYING WITH THE MILKING MACHINE!!"

I just started cracking up!!!   That wasn't a bruise!  It was a hickey!!!   He'd put the inflation of the milking machine on his chin!

"HA HA HA!  That's funny, Mom?"  (He said with tears in his eyes - I think he was sure he'd get into trouble for playing with the machine.)

I could not stop laughing!  "Sweetie, that's so funny there's NO WAY I could be mad!  That's the funniest thing I've ever heard!"

His milk machine hickey was the size of a 50 cent piece!   We laughed all the way to town and, of course, I just had to tell the story a dozen or so times so everyone (including Zack) had a good laugh.

He never ceases to amaze and entertain me.